Best Out of Office Email Auto Replies Print

Admit it--you really wish you had the nerve to use some of these...



  1. I am currently out of the office at a job interview.  I will reply to you if I fail to get the position.  Please be prepared for my mood.
  2. You are receiving this automatic notification because I am out of the office.  If I was in the office, chances are you wouldn't have received anything at all.
  3. Sorry to have missed you, but I'm in the hospital having my brain and heart removed so I can be promoted to our management team.
  4. I will be unable to delete all the email you send to me until I return from vacation.  Please be patient; your email will be deleted in the order in which it was received.
  5. Thank you for your email.  Your credit card has been charged $5.99 for the first ten words, and $1.99 for each additional word thereafter.
  6. The email server is unable to verify your server connection.   Your message has not been delivered.  Please restart your computer and try sending again.  (The beauty of this one is that you see when you return who has done this over, and over, and over...)
  7. Thank you for your message, which has been added to our queuing system.  You are currently in 352nd place and can expect to receive a response in approximately 19 weeks.  
  8. Hi, I'm thinking about what you've just sent to me.  Please wait by your PC for my response.
  9. I've run away to join a different circus.
  10. I will be out of the office for the next two weeks for medical reasons.  When I return, please refer to me as Lucille instead of Steve.